I had a moment today that took me to my “Happy Mommy Place”. I think as parents we all have these moments strategically positioned in our lives to erase all the bad moments that happen while we parent. I think it is an evolutionary process that perpetuates the human race, for without it, parents, especially mothers; would never keep having children. It starts with the selective memory of child birth; we all forget the pain, weight gain, and nasty bodily functions (all of them) very soon after giving birth. True, it takes some of us longer than others and some of us never forget. Those of us who do experience selective amnesia; we have 2, 4, 6, 19 (don’t even get me started…) children and only remember the “wonder of childbirth”; of course only till it happens again and then scream… “What *&#** was I thinking…” and soon after you look into those beautiful eyes… you forget all the bad and go to the “Happy Mommy Place”. Over the years we move in and out of the “Happy Mommy Place” which is the one place that keeps us from “killing” our children 😉 I know it sounds bad, but be honest, you know it is true, we have all been there, that moment just before you go over the edge with frustration and insanity, that we remember the “Happy Mommy Place” and decide against dropping our teenage child off and having them walk the remaining 10 miles home, on the freeway, in the rain… Deep breaths 😉
We have more of these “Happy Mommy Place” moments when our children are young: first steps, first words, and first “I love you”, heck, first anything when they are young is news worthy… This is in preparation for their teen years. Really, we need a stock piled arsenal ready to get us through puberty… Think about it, most teens would never see Twenty if we didn’t remember when they were young, cute, innocent, sweet… POLITE!
My moments, seem to be coming more often now with my youngest son who is 16. This is a good sign; when my oldest son started to “mellow” around this age we knew that we were leaving the hormonal part of puberty and moving into a more pleasant parenting stage; not perfect just a bit more pleasant ;-). This leads me to my “Happy Mommy Place” moment.
Today was just one of those bad days. I felt tired, old, fat, gross and grumpy. I had to get groceries before picking my son up from school. I was on a deadline and trying to focus on not forgetting anything on my list and in my head. I vaguely noticed an older gentleman crossing my path a few times smiling and once mentioning all the “bargains”. Totally not sure what he was talking about and too focused to figure it out, I smiled, agreed and kept on going. In the check-out line I noticed him again as he hustled to stand behind me… Uh oh, now I’m getting that creepy feeling, regardless of how old he was, I was just a bit uncomfortable. He engaged me in small talk and I remained distant by polite. He finished checking out; I let him go first, smaller load and I wanted him through the line. As he was leaving he turned and walked back through the isle and said, “How would you like to go have some coffee and talk after this?” REALLY!! Nice, I guess, but, OMG he was at least 80! This was not really what I needed at the moment; I needed 35 and “hot” to pick me up. This was just… SAD. I declined and hurried off to pick up my son from school.
On our way home I recapped the “funny” story to him. I told him he would love it; anticipating the idea of any man, let alone an 80 year old man, picking up his mother would be hysterical. I finished the story with, “And he was at least 80 years old; that is as good as I get.” 😉
He barely took a breath before he answered, “Smart man! He has good taste.” I nearly hit the parked car on the curb turning to look at him?!?!
“Oh My Gosh, that was so nice, I needed to hear that today, thank you so much!” I said, still a bit surprised by his sincere and mater-of-fact delivery. He really meant it 🙂
“You are not going to get all weepy and weird on me are you?” He shot back with a bit too much disgust… And… the moment was gone 😉